The Lord Jesus as a stain on an obviously non-Teflon pan. Note the dramatic Crown of Thorns! No longer does one have to be dispatched by being torn asunder by arena-beasts, or rolled down a hill on a spiked wheel or flayed alive to be canonized; turn on your George Foreman and spray it with Pam and see what you get!
2 comments:
UPDATE INDIANA from your daddy:
After almost 2,000 years the Messiah, AKA the Son Of God, has finally returned to Earth as promised.
Although the faithful are rejoicing at the glorious news, leading theologians are at a loss to explain why the Savior chose to manifest himself as a maltreated Teflon®-coated skillet. Some have theorized that God really, really likes scrambled eggs, while others point to the traditional use of the frying pan to punish wayward husbands. One cult in Michigan is anticipating the Holy Ghost making an appearance as a divine spatula.
Not everyone is pleased with the sudden arrival of Jehovah Jr., however. Vice President Dick Cheney, for example, was seen heading for his underground bunker in Virginia. When questioned by reporters, he glanced fearfully at the sky and shouted “Cripes, man! Can’t you see the jig is up?” before scurrying into his armored limo. As the vehicle sped off, witnesses heard Cheney barking into a cell-phone about removing all pots and pans from the kitchen.
The Holy Frying Pan has not given any indication of mobility, or even awareness, and to all appearances is an otherwise ordinary piece of cookware. Experts believe He is merely biding His time, and will reveal His Plan eventually.
...
Post a Comment